In the spirit of the New Year, I am broadening my horizons
and allowing myself to be interested in new things, even if those things may
have been repulsive prior to this revelation.
As I type, I’m watching the Sugar Bowl on ESPN…and I’m cheering for OU.
Yeah, I know. But…new
year, new things. My teen was in the
living room with me when I cheered for a 4th down conversion, and he
looked at me with pure confusion mingled with disgust and asked me what in the
hell happened to me. I can’t say I blame
him. This is extremely atypical
behavior, but I’m going with it. I may
be a pod person.
Speaking of pod people, my boys continue to surprise me on a
regular basis. Sometimes they even
surprise me in a good way. I have definitely
learned a few lessons from them in the past few days. At the beginning of the school year, N found
a pair of wireless Powerbeats at school.
Rather than turn them in, he thought he might keep them, but he must have forgotten that I am
his mother and I notice when he brings home expensive earbuds that I know were
not purchased by any of us. When I asked
him where he got them and he told me he found them, I told him it was
ultimately his decision, but I hoped he did the right thing and turned them in
to the lost and found at school. He
swore nobody would miss them, but I told him it could be someone’s most prized
possession…we don’t know. He turned them
in the next day, and I told him I was very proud of him. He never mentioned them again.
So, when I began figuring out what the get the boys for
Christmas, I knew I wanted to see if I could find a pair of wireless earbuds
for him because I felt he had made a mature decision. I found a great deal, and when we finally
opened gifts at my house, I made sure it was the very last gift he opened. The look on his face is one I will remember
for the rest of my life. On a side note,
B had only asked for one thing (a stunt scooter) which made Christmas shopping
insanely difficult for him. He was
watching this scooter on several online stores, and saw that it had been sold
out, so he was lamenting about how it was all he ever wanted and why didn’t I
go faster? That was the last gift he
opened as well, another face I have filed away for the rest of my life…because
I’d rather live in the moment than document with pictures. Also, that is not my area of expertise.
Anyway, they were both thrilled with the assorted things
they got, and especially the things they never expected, and life was peaceful…until
a few days later. N and I went to
Academy to exchange a hoodie that he received but felt was too small. He had
the earbuds with him, and when he decided to try on a sweatshirt, he handed
them to me. Now, I’ll stop here to
ponder aloud: Why did he give them to me?
Why did he have them in the store when we were just there to run in and
exchange one item? Why didn’t he just
put them in his pocket since he had pockets (and I did not)? Why are they my responsibility? I bet you can guess what happened next…
We wandered all over the store and when we got to the car, I
realized I no longer had the earbuds. We
went back in and searched the store from top to bottom. I asked everyone I saw, and left my name and
number with the manager in case someone had a change of heart and turned them
in. The irony of someone walking off
with earbuds that were given as a gift but also a reward for doing the right
thing (even when it’s really hard to do) is not lost on me. N was pissed at himself and at me for losing
them. I was pissed at myself (for losing
them) and at N for bringing them into the store/not taking responsibility for
his own belongings. I said I would make
it right, and he told me he didn’t want me to.
He said I did so much for him and for B that I didn’t need to replace
them and that he was really grateful anyway.
And I got teary.
An hour or so later, I was still beating myself up about the
earbuds, and I likened the situation to someone stealing my iPod out of my car
years ago. It was not the same, but it
kind of was: I used the thing all the time, and it really sucked when it
disappeared. The boys started asking me
questions about it: Why did you like that particular generation? (The 6th
generation Nano was small and I could clip it to my tank top.) Did you like the pink one? (My dad picked it…and
I liked it, but I would totally rather have red.) What size memory did mine have, and was it
big enough? (8gb, but I’d prefer 16gb)
And then they suggested I look around and see what I could find. When I found one that met my criteria, N took
over my computer and purchased it.
Yes. You read that
right. My boys took their AMEX gift
cards my sister gave them for Christmas and opted to use them to buy something
for me rather than use them for something they wanted. I burst into tears! N told me I always do a lot for them and they
never do anything for me. B told me it
wasn’t fair that I always gave them stuff they wanted and never really did that
for me…except mani-pedis (because that’s true).
I told him that was part of being a parent, and he said, “Yeah, but you
wanted it.”
It was the simplest statement, but the gesture was anything
but. I used that iPod every single
day. I would take the boys to school, and
then hit the marked paths by my dad’s house in Farmers Branch for an hour or
so. It was my time to decompress, to refocus,
to get lost in the music blaring through my earbuds, to run like hell from the
creepy ducks that chased me almost every single day. And one night, my car was locked (I KNOW it
was locked), but the next morning when I went outside, all of the stuff from my
console was on the passenger seat, and my iPod was gone. Nothing else was taken, and I am still
significantly luckier than the other people on the same street who woke up to
shattered windows and busted doors, but it was still really annoying.
So, now my iPod is on its way here, and I can’t wait to get
back to that routine. It’s been YEARS
since I’ve done it, but that routine made me happy, and since I have marked
paths literally across the street, I’m even more excited about it.
But, my boys, y’all.
I am floored by them on a regular basis.
Sometimes this is not a good thing, but this time it was. So, SO good.
It makes me feel like maybe I might be doing something right, even if it
doesn’t seem like it the vast majority of the time. And the most humbling part of this whole
thing is that N still wanted to do this for me even after his earbuds were
lost.
I know it will not always be hearts and butterflies, and
there are a lot more “meh” moments than happy moments, but I am so thankful for
the good. It makes me want to be a
better person.
The parents are the ones who are supposed to teach the
lessons, but this time, they definitely taught me.
Aubs
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